If I say something mean that everyone else is thinking does that make me a mean person.
Clare Dunphey, played by a fellow MILF Julie Bowen, may have popularized this quote, but I swear I said it first. The answer to the MILFS question is no; no it does not make you a mean person it makes you a real person. Anyone who knows me, knows this is me… I am the friend that says what everyone is thinking. It’s not that I’m being rude or arrogant, it’s just why sugar coat the truth? Why create an elephant in the room? Let’s get it all out in the open and discuss the facts. For example; Kelly Clarkson gained a lot of weight, am I body shaming her? No. The fact is that she put on weight, everyone’s thinking it… No one has the balls to say it.
Things I have said, that most likely should not have been said but were said and I know everyone else was thinking the same thing:
*Names have been changed for anonymity*
- “Jesus Pam*, what’s the on your lip, ew is that a cold sore?!”
- “OH MY GOD, who in this room smells that bad.” *while sitting at a table of people I don’t know)
- “No, I am not a lesbian!” (*during church)
- “it’s hot as balls in here” (sons school orientation)
- “Holy shit, who let the dogs out?!” (Very breasted women with full on cleavage)
- “I don’t know I feel like her boobs are not that big, I feel like it’s just 4 inches of padding and areola.”
- “Uhhhh this food tastes awful.”
- “Your rooms a mess.”
- “I don’t know, I don’t really like your outfit that much, I feel like you could have done better.”
- “Is there any beer here?” (At parent teacher conference)
Am I ruthless? Maybe. But at least I’m honest. And so should everyone else be. If someone has something in their teeth, tell them. If someone’s B.O is making the room smell rancid, tell them.